By
tuck
19 Jan 2002
chinese coke tastes like the coke from my high school. too much syrup, not enough carbonation. causes disgruntled emotional states.
<p>damn. i am so <span class="caps">SICK</span> and <span class="caps">TIRED</span> of being the worst one in a group playing pool. how is everyone so good at this stupid game? i come up with a good plan, eyeball the hole, aim up the victim ball with the ammo ball and fire it off. but the thing just seems to like <span class="caps">HATE</span> me or something. it never obeys. ill try to convey a particular idea to its little ol self, a good one too- but alas, usually it has an idea of its own. doesnt the ball want to go in? seems to for everyone but me. humiliation is commonplace for me in the poolhall or bar. i need to become a good player. it has latterly emerged as one of those essential manly skills that i missed aquiring somehow. i simply cant be the “cool foreigner in the chinese bar” without being able to woop ass on the green. so until i become the jedi-zen-pool-magician, im just a half-man and theres no way around it. </p>
<p>tips are welcome. this is serious.</p>
By
tuck
05 Jan 2002
to mention, there are many of these lame but chuckle-able pics from the night job, including one showing the aftermath of me throwing someone on a table of fruit. but i just assumed two were enough. let me know otherwise and i’ll mail them to you.
<p>also, now that i am armed with an ibook, i may actually begin posting things here. so. </p>
<p>be warned. beware. be sick. or whatever.</p>
By
tuck
05 Jan 2002
so, i got in trouble yesterday.
<p>for extra money i teach a high school english class for a couple hours each week. (also an elementary school class as evidenced by funny pics which should be visible in ‘journal’, and im also a wrestling gladiator sometimes as evidenced by the other funny pics. ok wipe the smile off your face, if you were offered as much mulla as i was youd be a gladiator too.) those of you who know me may shudder (or chuckle) at the idea of me in charge of instructing kids in anything. but, honestly, i had been taking the task rather seriously and actually planning neato lessons, homework and occasionally games. that is, <span class="caps">NON</span>-stupid games. possibly a first for a foreign language class anywhere in the world. and they responded well. in fact after the last few months of teaching, the school asked if i would teach english there full time. the answer was of course a big, smiling, whopping No. after all, i am in china for specific reasons and already feel loaded with stuff to do between training and language classes and keeping the guanxi growing and stable. </p>
<p>so heres where the problem began. over the last 7 weeks or so, the kids have been learning english as if their lives depended on it. the erudition became voraciously sought. they began practically snarling for words. its because i made it a life or death issue. not their own lives, but those of their characters. yep. ive brought tabletop, DM, GM, Vibro-Blade and Glitter-Boy role-playing to chinese high school; each item, story, mission and battle is born from my own will, interest and current mood. </p>
ive found a level where the english is understandable but challenging and they have to study and repeat and really know what is going on if they want to survive, which they do. ive created a special english world for them based on my own deadly imagination. heh. gotta smile at that.
<p>anyway. they tore into it. </p>
<p>they went home with item lists. plans. teams. at first, most of the new vocab were things like bastard sword,delay grenade, lava spell etc. and i knew it was a problem. so the weapons and spells and non-everyday words have been severely limited. but even so, attendance has been 100% lately, and this is a sunday morning class. their attention on me and on the story is distraction-proof. they want to solve the mysteries, gain the power, be the victors. homework a couple weeks ago involved writing histories of their characters. every single student wrote. and wrote. some drew supplementary pictures. in class, everyone was eager to share. hands in the air. only english. i gave them an urgency to learn. so they did. they like to win and shock and be creative with their options and freedoms within the scope of learning and practicing english.</p>
<p>but the story-based interaction didnt go over well once word traveled the quick route from student to parent to department-head to principal and then back to me. i was yelled at. mostly i heard bu hao (not good) and now i think the adventure may be toast. game over. which is a real shame. obviously english here is boring. the kids want to learn it. they know they pretty much have to in order to be a candidate for university entrance. but the atmosphere is crappy. just like high school french in america. i had the class at 50% text book, 50% interactive english. but the interaction seems to have been snuffed or limited to: now well learn what to say at the post office! and other trashy crappola they can easily learn from their level 1 english books. they, like any 14-15 year olds, really hate role-playing as the shop owner or customer. its boring. its redundant. and it shows whenever they try do it. but put a puzzle in there that may involve imagined physical distress upon failure- and have them speak as characters that they are proud of, and they work hard to not only say things, but also say them correctly for the sake of their status and safety.</p>
<p>im taken down by the negative response despite the overwhelming successes of the technique. parents have told me how much more their kids studied english since this class began. (ok, only two moms told me, but still. heh.) </p>
im pretty sure its done. outlawed from above. back to lists and drills and worksheets and memorization. oh how fun learning must be.
<p>i still think adventure based language learning is a worthy notion to consider. the books would be progressive. higher level books for higher level characters- which requires higher level english, naturally. it would work. myriad variations available. of course, i dont want to do this. but it would be neat. </p>
<p>ah well. to mention, i cant believe im actually teaching a class. not even exactly sure how this happened.</p>
By
tuck
13 Aug 2001
i know that opinions can change over time. likely these changes spring from a growth in “maturity” (whatever that word means) or education, or the turning of a page in the silly book of life. along with opinions and thoughts, tastes change as well. the best examples of this for me come from looking at my most revered heavy metal gods as they grow older and their musical styles curb towards pitter-pattering melodic stories reflecting their new paternity, or wrinkling dicks and graying hairs. watch dave mustane try to hang on; look at keith caputos self-labeled spiritual transformation; look at hevy devy (devin townsend) who once wrote a song called Oh My Fucking God which caused me to dig my fingernails into the back of a bus seat in rural china accidentally (while thinking to myself: oh my… fucking… god… this is intensely orgasmic while unknowingly mouthing the words: OH…….. .MY……… FUCK……. ING……GOD along with devin) now singing songs like Unity in which he simply repeats the soothing, graceful, gospel-esque words: Its alllll riiiiiiiiiight ten billion times.
<p>there is a point here… ah yes. somehow, over the past year, my taste, my opinion, my mind-for-sound has not only accepted a once loathed style of music, but has actually embraced it to the point of seeking it out when i can, and identifying it wherever it is. and (oh my fucking god) hearing it in my head when i sleep at night. </p>
<p>read on in the comment if you care to.<br />
By
tuck
16 Jul 2001
this china and the olympics thing… i don’t understand what the big deal is. in fact, i’m pretty confused by it.
<p>it seems like china itself should not be so concerned about the olympics being held there. doesn’t The Party consider the rest of the world a bad influence on its people anyway? why would they seek out the approval of a world they are at odds with? economic reasons only? that’s selling out. what kind of message does it send to the chinese citizens? people whose minds they are attempting to control…</p>
<p>also, since The Party hates free speech and dissemination of knowledge and even today covers up events and happenings that it fears the world would look down upon… why the hell would they want 10,000 reporters over there? is it possible that while the olympics occur they will stop killing their handicapped and stop beating the crap out of peaceful protesters and stop sending members of peaceful religious sects to concentration camps? seems like a good time for brave frustrated citizens to share with the world what life is like there… what’s the government going to do, beat a citizen in the street in front of <span class="caps">BBC</span>/CBS/FOX news reporters while he tries to explain how government agents entered his home and killed his handicapped brother in front of him? </p>
<p>also a good time for pulizer-hopefuls to probe.</p>
<p>fukc. man.. actually… what a perfect time for student protests… with 10,000 reporters there, and china trying to improve its image, there should be protests and if the government runs them over with tanks again, there could be no denial- more cameras and satellite links than at any other period of time anywhere else in the world. what would happen? hmm./</p>
<p>what would happen if a competing athlete one day wore an ever-popular “Free Tibet” shirt… or if there were peaceful protests by visitors who were there for the games… what would the government do? on a normal day, arrest and beat and deport. (or beat, arrest, deport) but the games, and the crowd, and the cameras… not normal days. i’m excitedly curious.</p>
By
tuck
24 Jun 2001
i finally got to tinker with the new ibook. i am seriously diggin’ it.
the casing itself feels really sturdy and durable. the plastic they used reminds me of the kind they use to make the smooth white sideboards of a hockey rink. it seems like i could drop a baseball on it from a couple meters up and have no damage. it also seems like i could probably get away with dropping it on a baseball from at least waist-high and not be picking up dozens of pieces afterwards.
the keypad is nice and squishy, yet secure feeling. and despite the size, my hands actually fit onto it nicely. the keys themselves actually feel a bit wider than normal keys- but it could just be me.
the dvd/cd-rw combo drive seems like it would be ultra-mega appealing to most notebook users who have to make the either/or choice.
the ports on the side accommodate everything you could ever want, including an external monitor.
and for the maxed-out model (the combo drive, 128, ati rage mobility, 10 gigs etc) the $1799 seems more than fair.
i like this thing.
someone please tell me something that sucks about it before i go grab one for my trip.
By
tuck
25 Mar 2001
i think the most upsetting thing about sega calling it quits in the console market is that it is just another reminder of how retarded most people are.
sega has always had the most innovative, creative and unusually fun games- ever since the Master System in the 80s. but the masses always, without fail, respond best to hype and glitter. thusly, the dreamcast’s recent demise based on slow holiday sales. the truth is that no one- not even sony loyalits, argue the fact that the dreamcast’s game line-up was the best in the world.
what good is a system that only has a small handful of great games, compared to one that has countless epics and more on the way? it is the latest, sleekest, shiniest and most expensive things that turn americans on- regardless of functionality.
it is sad.
but, of course, now sega will basically do what it always did do best, which is make games. it’ll be hard to see sonic-team or the Phantasy Star logo appear on the game-cube or ps2- but i suppose that it’ll be a good way for sega to begin slow domination of the world through third-party game producing.
By
tuck
09 Feb 2001
is it possible to sit still enough (and long enough) to have barnicles attach themselves to your body?
i recently re-experienced how friggin’ hard and strong they are (my ass, primarily) and was struck with the idea of organic armor.
i pondered it before. but now i want to know why i haven’t tried to barnicate my knucklels, shins and elbows.
why?
why?