“Mark my words: this ‘Dewey Decimal System’ will be the death of Literature.”

how foolish i was to think that i would be able to sleep in on sunday morning living two blocks from the largest cathedral in the world. bells. all morning. loud bells.

i never realized how debilitating shear frustration could be.

it is certainly one of the worst feeling human emotions, and lately i’d go so far as to call it the absolute worst. anger, for example, can actually be fun and useful. sadness, (from loss, for example) can be hurtful… but it can be dealt with by realizing that what is gone is gone. there’s no use suffering over the past, it is finished. but frustration can be torture- it leaves you unfinished so you don’t get the luxury of dealing with whatever the situation is. there has been no loss, but there continues to be forever potential for loss. half of you wants whatever you’re frustrated at to just end/die/lose/leave, causing pain, but at least rendering you able to deal with it. but the other half of you won’t give up the hope that you can prevent the ending/dying/losing/leaving, even if you are sure you can’t. the second-guessing, the forever thinking… it starves you of the breath of closure and forces you to endure.

living in New York is surreal at times. Vaclav Havel (president of the Czech Republic), Emil Constantinescu (president of Romania), Elie Wiesel (author), and assorted other important people and their entourages (including lots of ominous looking black SUVs full of guys in dark suits) just passed by under my window.

two weeks before the patent was going to run out anyway, RSA released the RSA Encryption Algorithm into the public domain. personally, i’m just happy to have been one of the lucky 5000 who were fast enough to get the free t-shirt while the offer lasted.

i just scanned in and uploaded the ‘driftwood’ image to the portfolio. as i was typing in the date of the sketch, i noticed that i drew that one the day that tad was killed (well, he didn’t actually die until 3 days later if you want to split hairs). since i didn’t hear about it until a week or so later, it never registered. kind of creepy.

damn kidney thieves

i don’t know what i did, but i somehow made the comments disappear. the database is still there, so i don’t think they’re permanently lost, just some bug in the script. please stand by.

6 new images in the portfolio. all larger works that my sister photographed for me while i was home (they were much too large to just slap on the scanner). the new ones are the six left-most.

wreck

a painting i did of my sister’s old car after my first and last time driving a manual transmission.

pipes

i had a fairly serious obsession with the aesthetics of plumbing for a while…

foundling

i gave this one to my sister because it gave me the creeps

knotwork

i’m not so happy with the quality of the scan on this one but it was the best i could do. the original is very large (100cm x 60cm or so) and very detailed, so it was hard to capture. i spent enormous amounts of time in high school working on these sorts of celtic knotwork patterns; they would hypnotize me for weeks at a time.

chainlink dreams

the painting from the sketch which has been in the portfolio for a while

storm hill

a painting i did waaay back my sophomore year of high school

yellow and crazy